my Self

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Fort St John, BC, Canada
My husband, David, and I had been trying to have a baby since November of 2007. After 'letting things happen', we got the amazing news that we were pregnant in June of 2008. Sadly, that pregnancy ended at 9 weeks with a natural miscarriage. After two more chemical pregnancies, we turned to fertility treatments in 2009. That decision was a disaster, with lousy medical care and poor monitoring. In December of 2009, we made the huge decision to move onto IVF. Things fell into place like magic and we began treatment on January 15, 2010. After a blighted ovum in March, we did a successful FET in June, only to endure another blighted ovum in July. We kept up and underwent another IVF in September/October of 2010 with the arrival of our son, Brogan in July of 2011! After our lovely success (finally) we decided to undertake yet another IVF treatment and hope for a sibling for our little red headed boy. Well... so far it's worked. Our story continues below!

Saturday, April 16, 2011

Yoga and Renovations


It's official.  The entire top floor of my house is totally demolished.  Nothing but bare 2x4s and plywood.  Except for one room right in the middle that has been left untouched.  It contains something that gives me deep, intense pleasure on a nightly basis.  It contains my bathtub.

Throughout my entire adult life, a warm bath has been essential to my mental health.  A bruised heart would mean taking two and sometimes even three hot baths a day... not feeling well... I'll sink myself into a swirling well of aromatherapy and let whatever pain medications I've ingested to start to work.  My tub is where I find 30 minutes a day to visit the characters in the novels I'm reading, (currently the Mayfair Witches series again) and to reflect on the day behind me and plan the day ahead.


So the guys, being my husband and youngest son, have been patient and accommodating by leaving my horribly outdated, cracked tub alone.  I'm pregnant!  I need my bath!  It's the one time of the day when I am sure to not feel some kind of pressure or pain or the gross effects of gravity on my swollen midsection.

Okay.  David would freak if I were suggesting this was actually what our current tub looks like.  But the drama queen that I am, well, I wanted to make a point.  Any container that holds hot water and me at the same time is all I really need to qualify as a 'bath'.  I'm not fussy.  DISCLAIMER:  This is not our actual bathtub.  Although.  it's not far off...
I know it's going to go soon, though.  I will be weeks without the daily ritual that I so intently focus on when my work day is coming to a close!  The guys just can't keep working around that outdated, ugly little room with the peeling floor and crooked vanity.  It has to go.  To the dump.  Everything in it.  Sigh.

And... this is a lot closer to what our new en suite will look like.  Not *quite* the same, but it's the general idea.  Will my tub time be more relaxing, the books I read more interesting, or my armpits any cleaner as a result of this setting.  I vote YES!  Please note:  I am nearly 40 years old and this is the first time in my life I'll have had a 'nice' place to live.  I'm not bragging about my bathtub, I'm in awe of it! 
I am somewhat mollified by the fact that my *new* tub will be a deep, luxurious (and un-cracked) well of peace and tranquility.  It's going into a large en suite separated from the main bedroom by a wall of built in closets.  I will have my own dressing room complete with makeup table.  A lovely window will allow me to gaze at the snow, or the northern lights, or the stars or the summer leaves as the water massages my worry away.  I will have a sound system built in so I don't have to drag my iPhone into the bathroom if I want music.

So David and I have moved into the basement den.  He pretty much moved our bedroom and set it up exactly as the way it was.  I've never seen another person take someone else's comfort into such consideration.  We laughed at us living in a 'basement suite' at our age, and especially while being pregnant.  We're both a little apprehensive about the possibility of the baby (Brogan) coming early, but honestly, all he needs is a boob and a basket to be comfy for the first few weeks of life.

No, we didn't do this pose yet,
but it looks interesting, considering
how all the women are leaking things
we never knew we could leak, and
the class *is* a little crowded.
Oh, and this morning, I found time to take my first pre-natal yoga class.  Besides the room being about 10 degrees above comfort level, it was fun and interesting.  Half of the poses made me either feel the need to pee or pass gas, which made me nervous because there were about four women too many in the room and we were about 12 inches from face to fanny most of the time.  I wasn't alone in my experience, other women felt the same way!  I did manage to find a friendly face, another cheerful, intelligent woman whom I connected with as a result of this blog.  We were happy to see one another and went for a great lunch together afterwards where we got to talk about nothing but babies, babies, babies!  It's great to know someone else is as nervous and excited as I am.  I'm very much looking forward to next week's session.

Saturday, April 2, 2011

Bad Blogger!!

Our first day in Mexico - on Coco beach in Playa Del Carmen.
Feeling HUGE but happy... at least David makes me feel little!  26 weeks pregnant here...
 Life has been super busy....

We just got back from an amazing vacation in Mexico, David is home for the entire spring and work has been super busy.  It's all wonderful and I'm doing great.

The pregnancy is going perfect.  All tests are excellent, I have nothing at all making me miserable except a good case of acid reflux that is controlled by meds at night.

One of the most awesome memories in Mexico was swimming.  The baby seemed to LOVE it when I was in the water.  He must have felt weightless and comfy with the muted sound and smoothness of me swimming.  Getting in and out of the water was sometimes challenging as we snorkelled some of the natural cenotes... there were a few times when I felt super fat and awkward, but for the most part, I was a good trooper and kept up for the most part with everyone.

I ran out of my acid reflux medication for the last three nights and that was the worst part for me.  I woke up a couple times a night gagging and throwing up the most vile crap.  Dry heaving and the horrible taste is not a way to enjoy a night, and it was hell getting back to sleep afterwards.

Good news.... not even a tiny bit of swelling, which actually surprised me with all the travel and sitting.  I did manage to eat really healthy and drink tons of water, so I guess that is good advice after all!

On our way home from Edmonton David and I stopped at Babies R Us and purchased our baby essentials!  It was a great experience.  For the first time I didn't feel like a hopeful impostor.  Baby boy squirmed and booted his encouragement and reminder that there is someone who will need a few of his own things when he moves in with us.

We were thrilled to find the original crib we wanted on sale and purchased it for $249 ($400 off).  Then we moved onto the car seats.  Ugh.  Too confusing.  Things have changed a lot since my boys were born.  We finally settled on an infant to toddler model.  We were given an almost new infant seat that is clean and in excellent condition.  We'll use whichever one we like the most, and we do have more than one vehicle so an extra one might come in handy.

A mid-sized playpen for the first few months in our room seemed like a great decision.  We'll use it in my work nursery when I go back, so it seems like a good choice..... purchased a Fisher Price swing and a great quality breast pump and Tommee Tippee  bottle system.

The truth is there are so many products out there that it's impossible to know what is going to be best until we try it.  I just know that instinct told me to get going and get some of the essentials.  I might be too big and tired and busy to make another trip back to Edmonton and Fort St John does not have the best choices when it comes to shopping.