Even though I cried so hard I blew snot bubbles at David over such things as
- my new jeans were too big
- my shoes were all wrong for my outfit
- I hadn't done my toenails so I couldn't wear open toed shoes
- David wasn't helping enough at the store
- when David DID help, he made me feel bad
- or I had to give him too much direction
Then.... when I was done with all that.. broke into hysterical laughter and then sobbing again... finally cleared up the boogers and tears...he said,
"You are either pregnant or nuts."
Bam! Sobbing again!
Okay I can laugh now. So can David... he was really awesome with it all....
So with being a certified bitchy nut, I also had a very sore back and boobs.
Here are my latest tests...
The skeptic tells me to beware. These tests were pretty much DRY before I got anything I could actually photograph. But... the dreamer in me thinks...evaps don't have color. Evaps don't get darker over time. Evaps don't happen three days in a row. And that cheapie internet stick at the top? I've been TRYING to get a freakin' evap for days now... That line is thicker than I could hope for...
I don't know. I feel pregnant.... and I don't feel scared this time.... I just wish those lines would come faster. Never enough, eh? Never enough? Gun shy.. this would be my fourth pregnancy in a year.
My niece asked me the other day, in a concerned voice, if we were going to 'keep trying'. I was kind of shocked at the question... is that what people think? That we should give up? That it's not working for us, that we are too old, or infertile? I don't think of ourselves that way at all... after being immersed in the Grief & Loss boards, our problems are the common cold when compared to the real cancer of infertility. We get pregnant just fine... and our issue is easily solved with proper medical care. It's just getting a good, sticky egg, and that's just a numbers game, one we apparently are getting better at playing.