my Self

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Fort St John, BC, Canada
My husband, David, and I had been trying to have a baby since November of 2007. After 'letting things happen', we got the amazing news that we were pregnant in June of 2008. Sadly, that pregnancy ended at 9 weeks with a natural miscarriage. After two more chemical pregnancies, we turned to fertility treatments in 2009. That decision was a disaster, with lousy medical care and poor monitoring. In December of 2009, we made the huge decision to move onto IVF. Things fell into place like magic and we began treatment on January 15, 2010. After a blighted ovum in March, we did a successful FET in June, only to endure another blighted ovum in July. We kept up and underwent another IVF in September/October of 2010 with the arrival of our son, Brogan in July of 2011! After our lovely success (finally) we decided to undertake yet another IVF treatment and hope for a sibling for our little red headed boy. Well... so far it's worked. Our story continues below!

Monday, December 14, 2009

The Final Step

In a vastly fertile family, it seems kind of freakish that I will be moving onto IVF.  David and I had big talks about it and while he has more fear than I do about the entire thing.  I want it to be over one way or the other.  I am tired of every month, every plan, every season being about me 'maybe' being pregnant.  Plus the drugs make me fat.  I really dislike being fat.  I have managed to gain 20 lbs of fat since I started the drugs and not one bit of it can be contributed to pregnancy.  It's actually non-pregnancy fat.  Not cute and charming like pregnancy fat, which can be easily overlooked when you have a cooing, gorgeous newborn to distract those intruding eyes.

So the papers came in the mail today.  The legal forms required to procreate.  I remember when getting pregnant meant having a few too many beers and praying feverishly for your period and avoiding the pregnancy test until you were about ten days late.  We have to have STD tests; AIDS and Hep B and C and small pox and even syphillis and chicken pox.  Yes I know the 'pox' are not STDs but they are still on the list.  Nobody wants to create a baby from impure ingredients I guess. 

And I get to have another FSH test.  It was a year ago this month when I had my first one.  I wonder if all my 'good eggs' have been wasted on the useless IUI cycles we did (mostly uninseminated - is that a word, un-inseminated?)  I mean, did I have like... 30 good eggs left and they are gone?  Can my FSH really raise in 12 months...? 

This thing is going to a whole new level and while my hopes are raised, I am all too aware that the height from which I might fall is raised as well. 

1 comment:

  1. I know IVF is such an overwhelming thing, but it gives you and DH such a huge jump in the odds for conception. I am excited to follow you through the journey, and I pray that it ends with a little baby in your arms. When do you get started officially?