my Self

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Fort St John, BC, Canada
My husband, David, and I had been trying to have a baby since November of 2007. After 'letting things happen', we got the amazing news that we were pregnant in June of 2008. Sadly, that pregnancy ended at 9 weeks with a natural miscarriage. After two more chemical pregnancies, we turned to fertility treatments in 2009. That decision was a disaster, with lousy medical care and poor monitoring. In December of 2009, we made the huge decision to move onto IVF. Things fell into place like magic and we began treatment on January 15, 2010. After a blighted ovum in March, we did a successful FET in June, only to endure another blighted ovum in July. We kept up and underwent another IVF in September/October of 2010 with the arrival of our son, Brogan in July of 2011! After our lovely success (finally) we decided to undertake yet another IVF treatment and hope for a sibling for our little red headed boy. Well... so far it's worked. Our story continues below!

Friday, February 27, 2009

Touchy, Touchy!

That's me the last three days.... really quite touchy and not in a 'oh, feel me!' kind of way. I mean in a grrrrr kind of way. A confrontational way. A not-like-me kind of way.

Times like this make me really dislike the effects of the Clomid. I mean, the Clomid is doing it's job, but part of that job is to create a hormone whose effects on the body are very much like pregnancy.

Bloating. Gassy. Moodiness. Anxiety. Sore boobs. Lovely, eh? It's a good thing you get these symptoms AFTER you ovulate because there wouldn't be a lot of BD'ing going on with a bloated, gassy, anxious, pissed off woman with sore tits, would there? Thank God David's gone right now. I think I'd be more apt to a toe-to-toe i-told-you-so kind of interaction than anything he might have in mind.

And this isn't like me. I try to be so supportive of him when he's gone. Nothing a man likes more than to call home after along day and have his wife nag and tell him how lonely she is or how much she thinks his decision on the wedding bands wasn't what she wanted. But the last three days I've actually cried when he was on the phone. CRIED?! Once over the dog shedding in the house. Yeah. I admitted it. Laugh away.

I am hopeful about this cycle simply because the last time I remember being so bitchy was the last time I was pregnant. I was a freak. I called my oldest son and actually picked a fight with him. I *never* do crap like that. I have other symptoms, even at only 6DPO, but nothing that can't be directly related to Clomid. My little wonder drug. hehe

Okay. Enough rambling. It's late again. I'm avoiding sleep again. Goodnight to Jerry, way up North in some oilfield camp. Goodnight to Mason, working night shift on a water treatment site out in a farmer's field. Goodnight to David... way East in some oilfield camp. None of my men are in thier own beds tonight. I miss them all!

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