6 Weeks 6 Days Pregnant

Oh how I love writing the title of the posts.  I've never been able to go past seven weeks so far.  Sad, but true.  And yet each and every time I grab onto the hope and swing on it like Jane clinging to Tarzan.  As if my life depended on it.

I had a fear-fit this weekend.  Just the reality of how close the ultimate answer is is freaking me out a bit.  What if it's another blighted ovum?  What if there's no heartbeat?  What if there is?  David and I talked about how 'comfortable' it is to be sad.  How that's what we are used to and know how to handle after three years.  Like a worn, useless glove that fits perfectly.

David and I talked about how positive we are this time, and I worried that we might be setting ourselves up for a bigger fall.  I loved what he said, "I'd rather be happy for a few weeks and then really sad for two days than be worried the entire time and still be sad for two days."

Of course, I combatted my fear with some major attempts at finding medical information online.  I found a great case study.  I then kept on looking and found a very promising article that, among other things, stated this:

Serum hCG values in infertility

Serum hCG values for the diagnosis of early pregnancy in patients undergoing in-vitro fertilization–embryo transfer (IVF-ET) have been studied.¹³  Serum hCG levels 14 days after embryo transfer correlate with pregnancy outcome. In a study of 111 patients with positive quantitative hCG levels 14 days after embryo transfer, the following pregnancy outcomes were observed:

• Levels <300 mIU/mL, ongoing pregnancy rate was 9%
• Levels 300-600 mIU/mL, ongoing pregnancy rate was 50%
• Levels >600 mIU/mL, multiple pregnancy rate was 100%

Therefore, in this particular population, quantitative assay results can be used to guide counseling and further evaluation.

Interestingly enough these values refer to hCG levels 14 days past embryo TRANSFER - not RETRIEVAL.   I didn't notice that at first and was a little freaked.. but then when I thought about it, honestly.. not too many of us have more than 300mIU/ml at 14DPO...

The study had a lot more to say, as did the first one.  If you are interested I highly suggest a good read.  You'll have to pick your way through the medical jargon, but if you concentrate and re-read it a few times, you should be able to get some *real* information, not just forum or blog opinions.  

It's very early on Monday morning. I've been up since five when David left for work.  I am contemplating getting another beta this morning but I don't really see the point.  If it's low I will just be in total agony, if it's high I still won't know for sure what's going on until the ultrasound.  Might as well just keep my head in the sand and look forward to Wednesday.