my Self

My photo
Fort St John, BC, Canada
My husband, David, and I had been trying to have a baby since November of 2007. After 'letting things happen', we got the amazing news that we were pregnant in June of 2008. Sadly, that pregnancy ended at 9 weeks with a natural miscarriage. After two more chemical pregnancies, we turned to fertility treatments in 2009. That decision was a disaster, with lousy medical care and poor monitoring. In December of 2009, we made the huge decision to move onto IVF. Things fell into place like magic and we began treatment on January 15, 2010. After a blighted ovum in March, we did a successful FET in June, only to endure another blighted ovum in July. We kept up and underwent another IVF in September/October of 2010 with the arrival of our son, Brogan in July of 2011! After our lovely success (finally) we decided to undertake yet another IVF treatment and hope for a sibling for our little red headed boy. Well... so far it's worked. Our story continues below!

Monday, November 8, 2010

6 weeks Pregnant

Tomorrow, I'll officially be six weeks pregnant.

Tomorrow I'll get the final beta test result.  I went today to get one more beta.  My sore and tired veins were not cooperating so I took that as a sign that enough was enough - just take the good news and run with it.

Although I wish I could say I am totally comfortable with the positive attitude, I would not be honest.  I am about 90% confident that we will get a heartbeat next week.  The 10% is pretty freaking normal for a woman who has gone through what I have gone through.

It seems surreal... literally like I am dream walking when I think about things going well.  Usually by this point I am a bloody emotional mess.  I'm usually crawling with anxiety about the looming ultrasound... even though last time I was fairly confident, there was a huge part of me that was totally prepared for the empty blob on the ultrasound machine.

I am expecting my beta to be somewhere over 20,000... I'll get the results at about 10 a.m. I hope.. perhaps after noon as I went to the lab late.

How am I feeling.... well... here's a little breakdown:

 - A little more tired than usual - sometimes I just want to lay down and relax.
-  Not into eating that much last few days... nothing seems appealing.... no nausea, just lack of appetite
-  Constipated - Ugh.  I know.  Sorry.
-  Sore lower back... usually in the late afternoon/evening
-  Occasional mood swings
-  Sore breasts - comes and goes
-  Some pulling/tearing sensations in the mid abdomen still - when moving quickly, or stretching.. not as bad as it was but still there
-  Emotionally I'm still pretty apathetic... what will be will be.  I have periods of doubt and periods of joy... Mostly I have periods of trying to distract myself and not think about it.
-   Oh, and vivid, vivid dreams.  Several... every night.  Vivid.

Honestly I thought I'd have more symptoms than this.. you know... examining my toilet real close up on a daily basis... an extreme reaction to raw meat or cooking eggs..... sheer exhaustion or bouts of crying...

But nah..... I just kind of feel like me... with the little aches and pains and worries magnified jus' a bit.


  1. 6 weeks is great! It must be so hard to relax though. I hope your ultrasound goes very well and some of your worries can be washed away!

  2. Congrats on the last beta!! Don't worry so much about symptoms (the only time I have ever had symptoms was when I miscarried), with my DD and now this pregnancy, barely anything, nothing noteworthy anyway, except the dreams - wow! I don't think the examining of the TP ever goes away until after they are born! Just enjoy that today you are pregnant. I am so excited for you Sonja!!

    Jill (WTE)