my Self

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Fort St John, BC, Canada
My husband, David, and I had been trying to have a baby since November of 2007. After 'letting things happen', we got the amazing news that we were pregnant in June of 2008. Sadly, that pregnancy ended at 9 weeks with a natural miscarriage. After two more chemical pregnancies, we turned to fertility treatments in 2009. That decision was a disaster, with lousy medical care and poor monitoring. In December of 2009, we made the huge decision to move onto IVF. Things fell into place like magic and we began treatment on January 15, 2010. After a blighted ovum in March, we did a successful FET in June, only to endure another blighted ovum in July. We kept up and underwent another IVF in September/October of 2010 with the arrival of our son, Brogan in July of 2011! After our lovely success (finally) we decided to undertake yet another IVF treatment and hope for a sibling for our little red headed boy. Well... so far it's worked. Our story continues below!

Tuesday, July 6, 2010


Monday's beta wasn't quite as good as I had hoped.  145.5, with a doubling time of just under 60 hours.  Not great, but Dr. H seemed to be pleased and didn't order any more betas, just scheduled my ultrasound for July 23rd.  Oddly enough, I am not nervous. 

A fellow IVF pal and blogger wrote that she didn't know if her lack of nervousness was due to confidence about the pregnancy or acceptance of sadness that might come to be. 

I thought it was a brilliant expression of honesty, and made me wonder about my own lack of concern about this pregnancy.  Am I relaxed because even though my numbers are low and slow, I feel that this baby is just a slow starter and that betas are all over the place for each pregnancy?

Or have I progressed to the point of sad acceptance of anything that might be thrown at me?

Don't get me wrong - I'm still pretty pumped about this pregnancy.  I feel pregnant, and I am exhausted with sore boobs and emotions leaking out of my face every time I turn around.  Oh, and I took another hpt today ....  the last time I took one was at 14dpo and I was troubled that it didn't show up right away, and that it wasn't darkening very much from the day before.  Today's line came up before the control line, and was thick, much darker than the control, and a really nice boost to any doubts or fears I am carrying around with me. 

1 comment:

  1. Hey there Sonya, I just wanted to pipe in here and say that I still have my stats at betabase, and at 15dpo I was 246 from 135, with a doubling time of 55.45 hours. I think your numbers are good! Fingers crossed for you! :)